Friday 13 November 2009

i am such a clutz

I can be a massive ejit at times and I am the sort of person that embarresses myself on a fairly regular basis. I don't plan these things but cringe at the memories!!!

here are a few examples, from most recent, going back....

1) It was a no-news day at the paper that I work for so I decide to shadow the photographer, great learning experience...to be fair it was.
So the first job was to go and photograph this bloke trying to promote a single...I am sure he wasnt the full shilling. So we turned up at this blokes bedsit and it stank of males. We did the photo outside and went on our merry way.
We pulled up to the next job chating and setting the world to right and I nearly take myself out on the paperwork he had in his car.
So we parked and attended the service. Finished it and came back to the car park, which is very busy all the time.
The photographer sees someone he knows and using his ket fob, unlocks the car. I didn't see which car it was because I was looking at my notes.
I then get into his car, a small silver car.
I look around and think ahhh bless he has sorted out all the papers, thats nice of him. Next thing I know he is walking past me in the small silver car appearing to be looking for something...and then it dawned on me, he was looking for me....I was sitting in completely the wrong car!
I got out the car and he said "where have you been?" By now I cant talk for laughing and I just pointed at the other car and tried to say "ive been in that one".
he gets the jist and he then doubles up laughing...someone waiting to pull into our space as seen the whole thing and he is laughing at me.
Please bear in mind that this is the first time that I have ever met the photographer and am still getting to know him...perfect ice breaker dont you think??

2) I worked for a fairly large international company a couple of years ago and was attending an important meeting.
Ohhh I thought, I chance to look really good and professional.
An hour I spent getting ready, doing my hair, getting a face on, I thought I looked really good. I had recently found "lip inks", these are lipsticks which when applied stay put for about 8 hours.
So off I go, I walk Theo to nursery and then on to work....its a very windy day.
My hair is loose, I am wearing a wrap around skirt and because of the wind I am trying to keep hold of it all.
I get to work with about 10 minutes to spare before the meeting, so I went to the loo to "adjust" myself.
The wind and swept my hair across my lips and then wiped round my face, thus leaving the un-removable lip stick in neatlines across my face...shite
I try and wipe the stuff off, the wipes get more vigorous, and now I have red streaks across my face with red blotches...I looked like I had really bad excema...not a good look....please remember that this is on just one side of my face....I did look like a half made up clown and because this stuff stays on for 8 hours, well you can see why it was embarresing.

3) Wearing a short skirt (in my much slimmer days) I sat on the bus on the way home.
It came to my stop so up I got. I swung my rucksack over my shoulder and went on my way...about a mile walk from the stop to get I stopped to chat. I said my good byes and started to walk away....STOOOOPPP shouted my friend and ran up to me and started to try an wrestle my bag off my shoulder, confused and a bit miffed off, I asked why the hell was going on...she then informed me that I had caught my skirt in my bag and could see my bum (it had to be the day I wore a gee string)...I had walked the mile home flashing my bum for all to see.....


So you can see I am a bit of an ejit at times and cringe at some of those memories, well atleast I can smile and cringe, because if your gonna do it, do it in style.

So my question / thought for this entry is, what memory makes you cringe and have you ever told anyone about it?

1 comment:

  1. Oh, I've got a million of them. Here are a couple from my blog. You made me laugh with your anecdotes. I've always been a clutz. I even won a district-wide humorous speech contest at Toastmasters a few years ago relating some of my stories. Like I said, I have a million of them.

    This one I title, "He Screamed Like a Girl" after my husband saw me...well, you just have to read it.
    http://tinyurl.com/3yh2ccb

    I wrote this one after I spilled a gallon of ugly gray paint in the floor of my Cadillac.
    http://tinyurl.com/nqpyq6

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